Need to increase your sex drive or libido? – an awkward conversation for many of us. I often get a sneaky text after an appointment, by-the-way email or a throw away line in a consult. Low sex drive or libido is a dilemma that affects many women, in perimenopausal and menopausal years but anytime really.
A common question is – I’m seeing someone new & I’m needing something to help with my sex drive?
Here are 5 Secrets to Successfully Increasing Your Sex Drive or Libido (the rest is up to you):
#1 ENERGY –
If you don’t have energy….I’m talking real energy ….not a caffeine or sugar high…..then you’re on the back foot to start. Energy isn’t just in your head it’s in every cell of your body. You need energy for your biochemistry to work properly and to power your sex drive. You don’t expect your car to drive you places without any fuel.
Here are three simple ways to increase energy – being hydration (2 litres water/day), good fuel (vegetables, fruit, meat, nuts, legumes), plenty of good sleep (bed at 10pm or earlier is ideal)..
If you have trouble with fatigue & low energy….come & see me click here to book in. We’ll work out a plan that at least doubles your energy within 2 weeks naturally…..it’s so easy when you know how.
Great thing about this is it helps ‘all of you’ not just your sex drive.
Did you know women need to de-stress before sex? … whereas men are the reverse….it’s actually a stress release for them….interesting! (we’re very different creatures)
So, if you’re feeling unsafe, hypervigilant or chronically anxious it’s going affect your sex drive. You’ll need to find your triggers or change the situation. Of course caffeine, smoking and certain drugs add fuel to this mix.
I see many people with chronic anxiety that is linked to gut problems (click here to find out why), so starting from somewhere can get you making progress in the right direction.
#3 VAGINAL DRYNESS
Vaginal dryness can make the whole experience painful & not something you want to repeat sometime soon. Sure you can use a lubricant but may women have reactions or sensitivities.
Vaginal dryness can be temporary or chronic. Here are some causes –
- Side effect of medication – like antidepressants, antihistamines (Telfast, Zyrtec, Polaramine, Phenergan), some asthma medication
- Alcohol – can cause dehydration
- Sensitivity or allergy to certain soaps, bath bombs or products used down there (tampons, pads, etc)
YOUR OPTIONS: lubricant before sex (sensitivities and reactions are common – may need to trial a few), vaginal moisturisers (Replens, YES VM or vitamin E oil, olive oil or coconut oil) applied every 3 days OR……..if low oestrogen around menopause is a problem, topical low dose oestrogen (Vagifem) twice weekly.
Good chemistry is an essential ingredient. Relationship issues can make this a problem. When you deal with the issues it is amazing how this area can change.
Having sex increases the desire for sex. So practice, practice, practice…..I’ll leave that one up to you!
There’s also a few herbs up my sleeve to get you moving in the right direction, but the foundations always need addressing at the same time.
Hope that helps.
Julie (Feeling Great Naturopath)
P.S. In person or zoom consults available….so you don’t even need to be local to Mornington/Melbourne area. Click here to book online if you need help.
P.S.S. Love to hear about your experiences and what has helped…email me at firstname.lastname@example.org
Overwhelm can grab hold and give you a big squeeze at this time of year. I’m seeing and feeling it’s effects on many clients as well as myself.
In today’s world we are bombarded with infinite distractions, choices and responsibilities. Perfect conditions for overwhelm – where you get crazily future focused, over-thinking and fearful, letting go of where you are right now. You’re left feeling dis-empowered, disconnected and exhausted.
What happens to you – fight, flight or freeze? Or a you a mix of all 3?
“You can’t calm the storm, so stop trying. What you can do is calm yourself. The storm will pass.” – Timber Hawkeye
What can you do about overwhelm?
Overwhelm is more about how you choose to respond to the world rather than the actual events. Managing your time and energy are crucial elements and keeping a big picture perspective.
Here are symptoms of overwhelm:
- Feeling anxious
- Nerves are shot
- Have no inner space
- It’s hard to breathe
- Constantly feeling stressed and tense
- You’re irritable
- There’s no fun in your life
- You’re feeling constant pressure
- Procrastination and indecision
Awareness is essential to finding YOUR antidote to overwhelm. So many people unconsciously live in an overwhelmed, anxious and stressed state. Take the time to check in now by stepping your mind back into your body then scan from head to toe like a glass of water emptying – “how do I feel?”, “how does my body feel?”
Here’s what you can do to shift overwhelm –
Have the courage to stop what you’re doing, step back and get a big picture perspective. Do this by shutting your eyes, deep breathing and checking in with your body – how do I feel? Opt out for chill time – 15 minutes, an hour, a day or a weekend to reset.
Overwhelm is literally your head being full of complicated thoughts. Let’s aim for simplicity and spaciousness. Ask yourself, how could I make my life simpler? Brainstorm possibilities.
3. Know your priorities
What’s most important to you? What do you value? How do you want to live on a day-to-day basis? How do you want to spend your precious time and energy? The answers will give you focused flow, which will feel so much easier.
4. Value yourself
Needing to constantly produce, perform and prove can be a sign of low self-esteem. You turn yourself into a human doing to get external appreciation and approval. Are you over-doing and over-committing? Check in – why am I doing what I’m doing?
When you value yourself, you are approving and appreciating yourself from the inside out.
5. Tune into what you want to feel
Refocus your attention and intention on how you want to feel most of the time. Is it balanced, free, kind, playful? What are your words? Now aim towards living it. Aim for progress over perfection.
6. Let go or limit things
Notice where you’re spending most of your time. What’s draining your time and energy? What are you able to delegate or let go of? A good way of uncovering these things is to journal nightly to uncover your overwhelm triggers.
Paradoxically by creating more discipline in your life, you have a greater sense of inner freedom.
7. Commit to less
Are you over-committing your time and energy? Are you setting unrealistic goals? Are you a people pleaser? Is it time to say thanks but no thanks more often?
8. Re-imagine a new schedule
Ok, it’s time to create a new schedule that keeps you out of overwhelm. If your happiness and health were a priority, what would your day look like? What time would you go to bed and wake? What morning routine would you have? How would you set up your day to thrive? What self nurturing elements would you include regularly?
Overwhelm is a very uncomfortable place to live. Know that it is only a perspective shift away and you have a choice in every moment. Is it time you chose, checked in, scheduled and made time for a new way? Start somewhere and improve over time.
“Promise me you will not spend so much time treading water and trying to keep your head above the waves that you forget, truly forget, how much you have always loved to swim.” – Tyler Knott Gregson
Wishing you a soul nourishing week.
PS. If self care has been missing from your schedule? Please value yourself and make time. Click here to book in with Emily Pettigrew, a Self Care & Relaxation Specialist for 1 hour Divine Massage (only $70) or Nurture Package or purchase a soul-nourishing bath soak online.
I see, hear, feel and totally get the frustration and challenges that go along with trying to arrive at your ideal weight. On the surface, eating a balanced diet and exercising sounds so simple, yet it’s not always that easy to arrive at your destination.
This is because being overweight is not about gluttony or laziness, but rather a complex interplay between your biology, environment and behavioural patterns.
Lisa was one of those stories.
She’d struggled for over 15 years to shift the extra kilos that kept stacking on around her waist, hips, arms and bum.
Lisa had starved herself until she couldn’t do it anymore then flipped to bingeing. She’s tried turning up the exercise dial but it was hard to budge and get momentum.
Dejected she spiraled into the I give up and who cares until she was now a borderline diabetic with close to 25kg to lose.
That’s when she saw me.
We negotiated a plan that suited Lisa, found what was sabotaging her success, then worked consistently testing, measuring and refining until we found what really worked for Lisa.
Four months later and Lisa’s a different person, both in body and mind.
She is now 70kg, exercises daily and loves it. Has 100% more self-confidence, is more active, feels freer and more engaged with her family and life. It has been 7 years now and still maintaining her 70kg target weight.
Do you want to find your path to weight loss success, just like Lisa?
Let’s explore 4 factors that can prevent you from making your weight loss goals real.
#1 Your metabolic set-point
Unknown to many, is your weight is under unconscious control; just like blood pressure, blood sugar regulation, pH and body temperature. Your body weight remains quite stable (unhealthy weight or a healthy weight) due to your metabolic ‘set-point’.
That is, your body will adjust your energy expenditure and appetite to restore fat mass back to its set-point;[2,3] despite your best efforts.
But don’t lose hope there’s ways to reset this set point so you can lose and maintain your weight long term. Pivotal to this are small changes done consistently but it’s slightly different for everyone. Hence no one size fits all generalised how to. Click here to book in to create a plan to change your metabolic set point.
Stress is a big barrier to weight loss, especially chronic stress. Under stress, your body releases cortisol that redirects glucose to your muscles, but causes your blood glucose levels to fall. This can trigger cravings for calorie rich foods that lead to weight gain and hinder weight loss. Emotional eating is also closely associated with stress. During periods of stress and emotional turmoil, you’ll tend to feel hungrier, with a preference for ‘hyper-palatable’ foods (high in fat, sugar, flavours and food additives), and you guessed it, weight gain. This is where help and guidance from a naturopath can help you build mental and emotional resilience, which may just one of your answers to losing those extra kilos.
Poor sleep quality and/or quantity can stifle your weight loss by reducing your metabolic rate, increasing cravings and turn down appetite regulation. Research has found poor sleep to be associated with an increase in weight, waist and waist-to-hip ratio; and can also drive up your metabolic set-point.  Poor sleep also affects your energy balance, affecting what you eat, how much you eat, as well as your willpower and motivation to exercise. If a good night’s sleep is something you dream of, talk to me and I’ll help you restore healthy sleep patterns.
Often missed, inflammation can be a silent barrier to weight loss. Inflammation can increase blood glucose levels that triggers weight gain, whilst excess stored fat produces inflammation in your body. Reducing your body fat can lower levels of inflammation significantly. However, the toxins stored in your fat cells are liberated during weight loss and dial up inflammation, once again impeding your weight loss. That’s where as a naturopath I can help you dial down your inflammation through clearing these excess toxins with a tailored clinical detoxification program to get you back on track again. Click here to book in for your tailored Detox program.
Don’t do it alone
Losing weight is not always easy and everyone will face their own challenges at some point. Seeking the help of a naturopath who specialises in weight loss can make sure you’re channeling your energy in the right direction and provides solutions when you hit a plateau or fall off the wagon. Click here to book in to get a helping hand on your weight loss journey today.
Big hugs Julie X
Adapted with permission from Metagenics Australia
 Bray GA, Heisel WE, Afshin A, Jensen MD, Dietz WH, Long M, et al. The science of obesity management: an Endocrine Society Scientific Statement. Endocr Rev. 2018 Apr 1;39(2):79-132. doi: 10.1210/er.2017-00253.
 Schwartz MW, Seeley RJ, Zeltser LM, Drewnowski A, Ravussin E, Redman LM, et al. Obesity pathogenesis: an endocrine society scientific statement. Endocr Rev. 2017 Aug 1;38(4):267-296. doi: 10.1210/er.2017-00111.
 Speakman JR, Levitsky DA, Allison DB, Bray MS, de Castro JM, Clegg DJ, et al. Set-points, settling points and some alternative models: theoretical options to understand how genes and environments combine to regulate body adiposity. Dis Model Mech. 2011 Nov;4(6):733-45. doi: 10.1242/dmm.008698.
 Raman J, Smith E, Hay P. The clinical obesity maintenance model: an integration of psychological constructs including mood, emotional regulation, disordered overeating, habitual cluster behaviours, health literacy and cognitive function. J Obes. 2013;2013:240128. doi:10.1155/2013/240128.
 Taheri S, Lin L, Austin D, Young T, Mignot E. Short sleep duration is associated with reduced leptin, elevated ghrelin, and increased body mass index. PLoS Med. 2004 Dec;1(3):e62. doi:10.1371/journal.pmed.0010062.
Curious about floating?
Floating isn’t new but it’s getting a lot of buzz right now because it has so many health benefits. It’s moving more into the main stream.
Origins of floating
Floating in salt water for therapeutic reasons isn’t new.
However, over the past 5 years, there’s been a serious renewed interest in the practice.
In the late ’50s, neuroscientist and psychoanalyst John C. Lilly, MD studied the effects of sensory deprivation flotation on anxiety disorders, addiction, and post-traumatic stress disorder. Due to the impressive benefits he saw, he developed a commercial float tank that anyone could use.
Floating flourished in the 60s more for the “experience” rather than it’s potential to heal. Then in the ‘70s, concerns over water cleanliness halted the industry’s growth. Nonetheless, the scientific study of floating — namely the effects of isolation on the brain — continued within the academic community.
Now floating has resurfaced and there are Floatation centres all across the world and in our backyard. My favourite is The Private Sea in Mornington.
So why would you float?
Looking after Yourself Before the Sh*t Hits the Fan. Protect Your Greatest Asset.
Going through, been through or even heading towards a tough time in your life? You know it’s guaranteed. Your greatest asset will always be YOURSELF. Yes, we often miss this one. Looking after Yourself is key!
When the word asset comes to mind, material possessions parade like a slideshow in your head, rarely do you think or treat yourself in this way.
I always say, “your body is the only thing you arrive in and leave with and when it wears out so do you. So, treat it like the gift it is.”
There is no time for disrespecting your greatest asset.
When you’re on track, you’re in a great state so you make great decisions. You’re balanced, centred, full of energy, optimistic, strong and courageous. Sure, there’ll be times of holy sh*t what will I do now, but you’ll be better equipped to deal with them.
How have you been treating your greatest asset lately?
Have you been feeding it crappy fuel and bunny hopping down the road, getting frustrated by it’s bad performance? Think of this next time you put something in your mouth.
For many, including mwah a health crisis can be a turning point in your life. I know mine was.