This can happen to all of us. We compare ourselves to friends, relatives, loved ones, workmates with bigger homes, who make more money, have more things, different mindsets. We compare ourselves to previous stages in our lives and expectations we have of ourselves.
And it gets us nowhere. Only breeding fear and insecurity, as we get into compare-and-despair mode.
So STOP IT!!!
You have a choice to stay in the comparison mindset or accept your present circumstances as divinely where you are meant to be at this exact moment in time. It may not always be that way but it is perfect in this moment. You are exactly where you need to be.
I without doubt choose the latter. How about you?
Here are 10 signs you’re comparing yourself to others:
1. You don’t feel good enough.
This is one of the two universal fears of every human being on the planet, whether that be Oprah Winfrey or Winston Churchill. The other is I won’t be loved.
We are all good enough. We just need to believe it.
Living in a place of inadequacy is a sure sign that you’re comparing yourself to others. Let it go and be the best you in that moment, because that is always enough.
2. You want more material possessions.
It can be easy to think that by acquiring more we’ll feel better about ourselves and that all of our problems will go away. This is such a band-aid approach, that only depletes us further.
Are your possessions (bigger house, more toys) running you or are you running them?
How much time and resources do you use to keep your possessions maintained, compared to using them to connect with yourself and others. On our death beds, regrets are not about not working harder or buying a bigger house, but rather about the state of our relationships with others.
By focusing on acquiring, you are ignoring and disconnecting from your presence with yourself and others.
3. You’re looking for something else to make you feel better.
Looking for outside validation is a sign that you are comparing. This goes back to the not good enough mindset. Nothing else beyond yourself is going to make you feel better. Focus on yourself and the connection within. That is where true freedom lies. Meditation is a helpful tool in this area.
4. You’re living in the past.
The past can keep you down. It can keep you living with that victim mentality. It can keep you comparing yourself to others or other times in your life. Stay in the present. It’s here that infinite goodness lies and you can put forth the best version of yourself.
5. Anything seems better than your present circumstances.
The more you resist your present circumstances, the more you look for everything outside yourself to fill the void you feel inside. Nothing is better than your present circumstances. You have the ability to make the best of it.
6. You are obsessively looking or focusing on external things.
This is a sure sign that you are comparing. By doing this, you are being taken out of the present moment. You are living thinking that something in the future is going to make you feel better about yourself. This is so not true. All you need is within, you just need to access it.
7. You hold anger and resentment.
Self-righteous anger can make you feel powerful and in control. In reality, it does the opposite. The more you hold onto anger and resentment, the more you’re hurting yourself and others.
8. You’re judgmental of others.
The more judgment you harness, the more you separate yourself from others. This is often a projection of your internal workings. Please judge yourself less and value yourself more. You are perfectly you in any given moment. Embrace it and go forward from there.
9. You lack gratitude.
Gratitude is the magic that cultivates happiness. With the comparison mindset, you think anything other than your present circumstances is ideal. Gratitude is lost and so is spiritual and emotional growth. Do yourself a favour and embrace gratitude today.
10. You take anger out on the ones you love the most.
When you compare, you’re unhappy. You are discontent and project this onto others. The people you love and care about often bear the brunt of this. When you notice it happening, take a step back and practice gratitude. Everybody including yourself will breathe a sigh of relief.
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